Author Archives: Alyx Dellamonica

About Alyx Dellamonica

After twenty-two years in Vancouver, B.C., I've recently moved to Toronto Ontario, where I make my living writing science fiction and fantasy; I also review books and teach writing online at UCLA. I'm a legally married lesbian, a coffee snob, and I wake up at an appallingly early hour.

Making much of the weekend

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I write fiction almost every day, but I do get in a considerable amount of downtime on the weekends now, and last week I spent much of it outside. It was sunny and warm and glorious out, and so there was walking: kelly-yoyoKelly and I were out for about a long stretch on Saturday, and Barb and I went out Sunday morning. We started at Jericho–you’ve already seen the terrier photo–and kept going until we got to the eagles nesting at the edge of Vanier Park. Here’s one, gnawing on a steak bone it found somewhere:

Eagles at Vanier Park

But you can’t just wait for the sun to appear, not on the Coast in the winter. Today it was dark and chilly but not quite raining when K and I set out toward downtown, through Strathcona. We went through the public part of Sun Yat-Sen, and had the place almost to ourselves, but for the ducks and about a dozen crows. Even the koi and turtles were hiding from the weather. We saw some early cherry blossoms and, as we continued past Gastown to Canada Place, a surf scoter*, which is just about the oddest-looking bird I’ve seen in person (as opposed to on TV).

I carry an Audubon bird book in my iPod nowadays, so we were able to identify it on the Skytrain home.

Bee attack(ed) in East Van

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Thought balloon: Dammit, I promised myself I would actually bring some of the flowers in from the garden this year, and have them in the house. I’m going to do that right now.

(Chop, chop, chop. Rend.)

Alyx: EEEEE! A bee, a bee, hiding in the crocus pretending to drown, undercover homicidal bumblebee of death, OMG, I’m going to dieeeee!!!!

(Run. Run. Crash. Pant pant pant pant.)

Thought balloon: Oh, no, I’ve probably killed her. Poor bumblebee! What can I do? I will rescue her! But wait! What if she suddenly comes to life and stings me to DEATH?? God, I hope the cats don’t eat her while I sit here waffling. OMG, what if she stings Minnow on the tongue? Extend your reach. That was what you did with drowning victims, right? Maybe a tablespoon?

Alyx: La la la… we’re all very calm heeeere.

All very calm… look, would you grab the fucking spoon already… yes, very calm…

Okay, bee. You can dry off there. Or freeze. I will say if you’re not gonna make it, I’d prefer it if you climbed over the edge of the flower box and plummeted three floors to your death so I don’t have to deal with guilt. Or your zombie sting-you-even-in-death corpse.

Bee: Flail.

Alyx: Would you be more photogenic if I moved the spoon?

(Click click click click click click…)

DSCN6727

The sad part is I’ve had similar encounters where the bee came off far worse. She seemed pretty robust after it all. And was obediently making for the edge of the window box when last I saw her.